Brian, still groggy even at 1 in the afternoon, rolled out of his bed with the sheets still around him. His only alarm was the incessant ringing of his phone. He tripped over the sheets and landed on his face. He got up and stumbled to the phone as it reached its 6th ring.

"Yoooo, Brian! That party was the shit! I can't believe you could drink that much!"

That was Brian's best friend, Rory, and right now, Brian wasn't thinking of him as a best friend.

"Yeah, neither could I. Now fuck off, I've got a fucking huge headache and I'm tired as shit right now."

"Yo! Don't back to sleep! I got something to take some of the edge off that headache. Come over to my house if you want some." Rory said. He was the kind of kid who watched too much TV and played too many video games; he believed the most extreme of any situation was going to happen, and right now, he was thinking the phones were being tapped because Rory and Brian were widely know pot users.

"Yeah, thanks. I ran out of weed 2 days ago. Or was it 3? Whatever. I'll be there. Just give me an hour." Brian hung up the phone before he could hear Rory's scolding because of the word "weed" was used over the phone.

Brian moved over to his alarm and set it for 1:55 PM, then fell asleep back in his bed.

--------------------------

Brian stirred from his sleep only after his alarm had gotten to such a fast, loud, and high pitched beeping that he had to turn the alarm off if he wanted to have some sanity. But as he was about to fall into bed, he remembered that he was supposed to go to Rory's house to smoke some weed.

He quickly got undressed, for he had fallen to sleep in his clothes from the party last night when he got home at 4 in the morning, then redressed into some kind-of clean clothes.

He pedaled his bike to Rory's house. He was still in pain from the headache, and the bright afternoon light hurt his eyes, so he rode slowly down the street.

When Brian rolled his bike into Rory's garage and dropped his bike to the ground with a reverberating thud, he didn't bother to go around to the front door; he just went in through the door right in front of him. Rory didn't care; Brian and him were best friends, and even if he did care, Brian didn't.

Rory was already getting the bong ready when Brian was able to find him in the basement. Brian said "You got enough shit for the both of us?"

"Yeah" Rory didn't bother to look up; he was too concentrated on the bong.

After half a minute of silence, Rory said "Ready. I'll light it." And so he did. They didn't bother to try to make a game out of it; first person to lose a hand of poker had to take a hit, try to make up a sentence with more than 10 words, but without the words "the" or "a", and others were the ones they used to do. But now, smoking weed was forth on the list of necessities besides water, food and sex. They just wanted to get their hits and trip.

After multiple hits from each, they began to trip. They both just sat around, watching DVD's of Aqua Teen Hunger Force and doing more hits. Then they began to hallucinate; Brian saw a purple half crab, half dog running in circles, trying to nip its tail with its claws while Rory saw a green monkey masturbating to the covers of the porn magazines strewn about. After more hits, they just sat around and continued to watch TV, and hallucinations went away. Brain glanced up at the clock; 3:48 PM. He didn't care. He was happy; his headache was gone and he was able to laugh at things that wouldn't have been funny to him.

But he was beginning to get the munchies. So he got up and slowly walked up into the kitchen. He stood there for 3 minutes, trying to remember why he came up. And when he remembered, he went over to the freezer and looked around. After searching, he was able to discover a box of microwavable burritos. It was buried in the ice, and Brian struggled more than he should have to get it out.

When he did get the box out of the freezer, Brian fumbled with the flap leading into the box. He tried to pull it, push and finally, when nothing succeeded, he cut a hole through the top of the box with a knife he found. It wasn't a hole so much as a gash that Brian had ripped bigger.

Brian finally was able to get to the burritos inside the box. He took one out, and tried to throw it into the microwave. But after 6 tries, Brian realized he didn't have the microwave door open. He tried to pull the door open, but was unsuccessful after straining for a couple seconds. He tried punching the door. If Brian hadn't had so much pot, he would have been in too much pain to continue. But he did, and was finally able to find the button to open the door after randomly hitting the microwave.

He put the burrito in, still wrapped in the plastic baggy it came in, and hit some buttons on the keypad of the microwave. Luckily, he had enough sense to hit start. Unluckily, he walked away and headed back downstairs to get some more bong hits before Rory hoarded them all in his body system.

10 minutes later, when Brian got hungry again, he went up stairs to look for some more food. Rory called to him "Do I look high? And could you get me some Doritos?" and continued watching TV, just about forgetting what he asked and letting out a laugh at Judge Judy.

When Brian got to the top of the stairs, he said "Alright", and went over to the kitchen. He saw some smoke pouring from the microwave and a smoke alarm going off. Barely noticing those distractions, Brian began to slap the microwave in order to get it open. When it did, smoke was released from the chamber, and most of it went into Brian's face.

Brian coughed, but still groped around the microwave for whatever was in there. He put his hand on it, pulled it out, then yelled in pain as the feeling of the burning plastic being fused with his hand began to reach his head and threw the badly burned and melted burrito, which hit the wall and stayed there. A stream of curses came from his mouth as he tried to figure out, as best he could in his current state, how to stop the burning.

He wiped his hand on his shirt, but that only caused his hand to stick to his shirt. Brain frantically tried to pull it off, but it didn't come. The new, sudden pain had slowly brought some sense back into Brian, and his high was wearing off.

After a minute or 2 of pulling, Brian's shirt finally ripped, and the now sober teenager had a holey shirt stuck to his third degree burned hands. Not knowing what to do, he ran back down into the basement, and rolled down the last 4 stairs. He quickly got up and literally shook the injury off.

After a minute of Brian patting and crying, Rory asked "Yo man I think we still got some weed in the bong, if you want some."

"Fuck the weed, you fucking douche bag! I got to go to the fucking hospital. Give me your fucking car keys!" Brian yelled, holding his hand.

"Oh, sure. Do I look high? 'Cause I feel so fucking high right now." Brian didn't even bother to answer as he ran back up the stairs and into the garage, tapping the button to open the other garage door. He got in the car, and awkwardly put the keys in the ignition with his left hand.

As he neared the hospital, the pain in his hand was subsiding into more of a throbbing pain. He still didn't feel up to using his right hand to drive, so he continued to the hospital using his left hand to steer.

When he got there, he showed his injury to the check in nurse, who marveled at it in a fake tone as she took down the information Brain knew.

Brian then sat in the waiting room for an hour and a half, hoping to get treated and stilled high enough to look at the kids magazines. When he did finally get called, he was treated as quickly as possible, but he still had to stay overnight at least. He didn't want to; he knew his parent would freak if they found him here. But they did.

Brian's parents ripped him a new one, especially since they found out he did it when he was high.

"And did you learn anything from our talk?" Brian's mom said after the 45 minute rant from his parents.

"Yeah," Brian said, giving up any fight in him, "never make a microwave burrito."

Updated: 06/27/08 11:45 PM Log in to comment! | Share this!